by Ellen Boeder | Jun 29, 2021 | attachment, attachment parenting, empowerment, Motherhood, Parenting, relationship
I was “warned” about a lot of things as I embarked on pregnancy, birth, and motherhood, from well meaning people. But it never felt good to be warned about how tired I would be, how I would have no time for myself, how hard my infant, toddler, preteen or adolescent...
by Ellen Boeder | May 20, 2021 | Motherhood, psychology
I just finished a five day solo retreat in southern Utah. It was the first time I’ve left my family to be alone (for more than a day) in over a decade. Wait, I did do a one night retreat when I was 7 months pregnant with my second child, does that...
by Ellen Boeder | Feb 21, 2021 | Marriage, nurturing, Parenting, psychology, relationship, Uncategorized, yoga
As a couples therapist and coach, sometimes I feel like I’m on the frontlines of a pandemic of individualism–especially when I’m facing how challenging it is for couples to think in a more complex, systemic way about their relationship. It is so hard...
by Ellen Boeder | Jan 10, 2021 | Uncategorized
My youngest child, my daughter, turned 10 years old in early December. Ten years seems like a great reflection point, and I’ve been trying to grasp how having this girl in my life for a decade has impacted me. I’ve come across one of her (many) enormous gifts...
by Ellen Boeder | Oct 21, 2019 | attachment, attachment parenting, Parenting, psychology, psychotherapy, relationship
Recently, a mother I know was confiding in me that through the help of professional support she was learning that her children are not securely attached. She was shocked to learn this (though it made sense to her) as she has been a stay at home mom, exclusively...
by Ellen Boeder | Mar 20, 2019 | birth, Motherhood, Parenting, psychology
Malcolm Gladwell, in researching great minds and talents, said that it takes 10,000 hours, or 10 years, to master a craft. All those supposed instantly talented genius’ out there have one common denominator: they put in about a decade of hard, unrelenting work before...
by Ellen Boeder | Dec 23, 2018 | attachment, empathy, Feminism, health, nurturing, Parenting, psychology, relationship
What if we parented our kids like our future depends on it? (Because, of course, it does). What does that look like? How do we treat our children in a way that considers their future roles, responsibilities, and opportunities? That respects the inevitable burdens...
by Ellen Boeder | Dec 7, 2018 | attachment, empowerment, Feminism, Motherhood, Parenting, psychology, relationship, values
Yesterday I walked by a man who was jogging wearing a t-shirt that read “Fearlessly Independent.” As he jogged past me, I thought about my current life, and how “fearless” and “independent” are definitely not words I would use to describe myself today. I certainly...
by Ellen Boeder | Aug 24, 2018 | attachment, empowerment, Feminism, health, Motherhood, psychology, relationship, values
Last summer, my parents and I got into a conversation about modern motherhood. They (and probably anyone from a previous generation) were shocked to learn—literally, their jaws were agape—that many mothers today experience a wide range of mental and physical health...
by Ellen Boeder | Dec 28, 2017 | attachment, Marriage, Motherhood, Parenting, psychology, relationship, values
In the early years of raising our family, when we had two very young ones in our care, I remember realizing how often I was overriding my need for rest, among other needs. I remember thinking, “Wow, it took me years to figure out what I really need and want, and now I...
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